Love Affair: A Noble Sentiment or Fake
Love?

Q: According to Islam “Is it bad to have a love affair?” I mean to say a fake love affair that is only for passing time and where both of them know that it is for passing time and for having fun. Please also, can you tell me the reasons and what harm does it cause to have a pre-marital love affair?

A: Nowadays, the word “love” has got other connotations and refers to other types of
relationships. One of which resembles a game of chess, just to enjoy a few hours and then
farewell. The couple may be planning for the way they separate even before they start the affair!
Love may also refer to the physical relationship, as it is a more decent word for “sex”. Instead of
saying: “make sex,” they say “make love”. Here comes my confusion, what type are you asking
about? I’ll dare say that you are not asking about the last type. Being a Muslim you must be
aware that sex outside marriage is totally forbidden in Islam.
Islam calls it zinah (fornication) and it is heavily punished in both this world and the Hereafter.
Many Quranic verses and Prophetic sayings acknowledge that. But if your question is still about
this second type, which you have qualified as “ fake love ”, let me first raise my objection at
calling it “love” because it is not. Then, second, let me express my worry about its dangers.
Man and woman are both born with this natural affiliation or desire between them. Allah never
looks down upon this desire in contempt. It is He who created it in people in order to make them
happy and preserve the human race from extinction.
Nevertheless, we have to be aware that the sparkle of this desire is created by the natural
attraction when a man and a woman come into close intimacy with one another. Thus, Allah who
created this desire in us is, simultaneously, very strict in observing the way we direct it.
This aimless type of love may lead – with the power of nature – to doubtful relationships, which
in turn, leads one to moral degeneration and psychological restlessness. The Prophet (peace be
upon him) confirmed in the following hadith that what is doubtful definitely leads to what is
forbidden. He said:
“That which is lawful is plain and that which is unlawful is plain. Between the two of them are
doubtful matters, about which not many people know. Thus he who avoids doubtful matters
clears himself in regard to his religion and his honor, but he who falls into doubtful matters falls
into that which is unlawful.” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)