Redirecting expectations: Finding true fulfillment in faith

By Yusuf Ali Bulafu
Assalam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.
In the journey of faith, one of the most profound challenges we face is aligning our actions with the divine purpose. Islam teaches us that the value of our deeds lies not just in their outward appearance, but in the intentions that drive them. This concept of doing things solely for the sake of Allah, without expecting worldly rewards or recognition, is central to the Islamic faith. Yet, in our human nature, we often find ourselves entangled in a web of expectations – from others and for others.
This article explores the Islamic perspective on intentions and expectations, delving into why purifying our intentions and directing our expectations towards Allah alone is crucial. At the heart of Islamic teachings lies the concept of Ikhlas, or sincerity. This principle emphasises the importance of performing actions with a pure heart, free from the desire for worldly gain or recognition. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) beautifully encapsulated this idea in a famous hadith: “Actions are but by intentions, and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended.” (Sahih al-Bukhari)

This hadith serves as a cornerstone for understanding the value of deeds in Islam. It teaches us that the outward action, no matter how grand or small, is not the sole determinant of its worth. Instead, it’s the intention behind the action that truly matters in the eyes of Allah. Ikhlas goes beyond mere honesty; it’s about purifying one’s heart and aligning one’s will with the divine purpose.
When we act with Ikhlas, we do so not for worldly benefit, but solely to seek Allah’s pleasure. This purity of intention transforms even the most mundane tasks into acts of worship. While having pure intentions is crucial,
equally important is freeing ourselves from the burden of expectations from others. In our interconnected world, it’s all too easy to fall into the trap of seeking approval, validation, or rewards from those around us. However, this mindset can lead to a host of spiritual and emotional problems.
Expectations from others can be a source of constant disappointment. Human beings are inherently flawed and inconsistent. When we pin our hopes on their reactions or rewards, we set ourselves up for letdown. A kind act might go unnoticed, a hard-earned achievement unappreciated. This cycle of expectation and disappointment can lead to resentment, frustration, and even a loss of motivation to do good. Moreover, relying on others’ approval can significantly impact our faith. When our actions are driven by the desire to please people rather than Allah, we risk compromising our principles. We might find ourselves bending ethical boundaries or neglecting religious duties to gain favour with others. This shift in focus from the Creator to the created is a subtle form of shirk (associating partners with Allah) that can erode our spiritual foundation.

Psychologically, constant expectations from others can be emotionally draining. It creates a state of perpetual anxiety as we worry about how our actions will be perceived. This preoccupation with others’ opinions can lead to a loss of authenticity, as we shape our behavior to fit what we think others want to see rather than what aligns with our true selves and our faith.
Furthermore, expectations can hinder personal growth. When we’re overly concerned with meeting others’ expectations, we may shy away from taking risks or exploring new paths that could lead to spiritual and personal development. The fear of disappointing
others or facing criticism can keep us in a comfort zone that limits our potential. In relationships, unrealistic expectations can strain bonds and lead to conflict. Whether in friendships, marriages, or professional settings, expecting too much from others sets the stage for misunderstandings and resentment. It can prevent us from appreciating the good in others and from practising patience and forgiveness – virtues highly emphasized in Islam. Ultimately, the problem with expectations from others lies in their instability and their potential to divert us from our primary purpose: worshipping Allah. By shifting our focus from seeking people’s approval to seeking Allah’s pleasure, we can find a more stable, fulfilling, and spiritually enriching path.
In Surah At-Tawbah, Allah says: “Say, ‘Sufficient for me is Allah; there is no deity except Him. On Him I have relied, and He is the Lord of the Great Throne.’” (Quran 9:129) Another relevant verse is found in Surah Az-Zumar: “Is not Allah sufficient for His servant?” (Quran 39:36) This rhetorical question serves as a reminder that Allah’s support and approval should be our primary concern, rather than seeking validation from others.
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) also addressed this issue in various hadiths. In one narration, he advised: “Whoever seeks the pleasure of Allah at the expense of people’s displeasure, Allah will suffice him from the people. And whoever seeks the pleasure of people at the expense of Allah’s displeasure, Allah will leave him to the people.” (Sunan at- Tirmidhi). This highlights the consequences of prioritizing people’s approval over Allah’s pleasure. It assures us that when we focus on pleasing Allah, He will take care of our affairs, even if it means facing temporary disapproval from others.