Weathering financial storms without losing each other

By Hatmah Nalugwa Ssekaaya

Assalam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

They say money makes the world go round—but sometimes, it can make love feel like it’s spinning out of control.

We have all been there. A business fails. A job is lost. Rent is overdue. School fees pile up. And slowly, the laughter in the living room fades. Conversations become tense. Resentment brews silently between sips of black tea and sighs at the electricity bill.

For many Ugandan couples, especially those juggling parenting, business hustles, and extended family obligations, financial hardship is not a what-if—it is a when. But how you handle it together can either draw you closer… or slowly tear you apart.

When love is tested by lack

It is one thing to smile together during honey-sweet dates at Cafesserie or strolls in Wandegeya after campus. It is another to choose patience when your boda guy business is down, or when you have closed your restaurant kitchen for a month because you can’t afford charcoal.

I have lived through that. As someone running Hatmahz Kitchen, I know what it means to count every shilling. But even harder than business hardship is the emotional toll it can take on your partner and home.

In love, financial problems don’t just affect your bank balance. They test your trust. Your communication. Your ability to work as a team under pressure.

A Scene from the Kitchen

“Babe, I am not angry because we don’t have money,” Aisha said quietly as she placed posho on the plastic plate.

“I am angry because you don’t talk to me anymore. I find things out after they have already gone wrong.”

Hamza looked up from his phone, shame written across his tired face.

“I didn’t want to worry you. I thought I would fix it myself.”

“But I am your wife,” she whispered. “We are supposed to carry things together.”

Silence. Then a nod. And a long overdue conversation that stretched late into the night, over porridge and raw honesty.

That is where healing begins.

What Islam teaches us

Islam acknowledges that wealth is a test—both in abundance and in scarcity.

Allah says in the Qur’an:

“Your wealth and your children are only a trial, whereas Allah—with Him is a great reward.” (Surah At-Taghabun 64:15)

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and Khadijah (RA) experienced both riches and ruin. They started with wealth and comfort, but after the boycott of the Muslims in Makkah, they went through extreme hardship—often going days without food.

But Khadijah stood by him. She encouraged him. She believed in him. And he never forgot that.

So dear wife, even when your kitchen shelf is empty, let your heart be full of rahmah (mercy). And dear husband, when you feel low and inadequate, let your words be filled with shukr (gratitude) for the woman who still chooses you—even when life doesn’t.

Practical ways to stay united

Don’t wait for eviction notices or bounced cheques. Be open about money—without shame or blame.

Even if it’s Shs 10,000 a day, agree on what goes where. Shared decision-making builds trust.

Wake up for tahajjud. Make du’a for barakah. Recite Surah Al-Waqi’ah. Trust Allah’s plan while doing your part.

Social media will show you couples in Dubai or dining at CJs. Don’t let it make you despise your spouse’s current hustle. Focus on your own lane.

Paid off a small debt? Managed a simple dinner without borrowing? Acknowledge it. Gratitude grows contentment.

Even a modest meal cooked with love and shared with contentment is more blessed than flashy spending in a cold home.

Money will come and go. But your partner is not disposable. You are a team—especially when things are tough.

At Hatmahz Kitchen, we have had seasons where we closed early because sales were low. But it’s in those times that I saw my husband’s resilience shine. And he saw mine.

We keep reminding each other that we are not defined by bank statements, but by sabr (patience), taqwa (God-consciousness), and muhabbah (affection).

So, to every couple riding the storm right now: Hold hands tighter. Speak kindly. Pray harder. Because love is not about avoiding storms. It’s about building a shelter that withstands them.

May Allah make it easy for us all… ameen.