When meltdowns speak louder than words

Janat Yahaya Naggolola – Parenting Coach

Assalam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

What looks like misbehaviour is often a silent cry for help.

The supermarket was busy that afternoon when a sudden burst of crying filled one of the aisles. A little girl stood there with tears streaming down her face. In her distress, she pushed items off the shelves, scattered groceries across the floor, and nearly toppled a basket filled with shopping. Within moments, the aisle was in complete disorder, drawing the attention of every shopper.

Many people whispered in disapproval, shaking their heads and labelling it misbehaviour. Yet for those who truly understand the language of children, this was more than just an unruly outburst. It was a silent message. It was a cry from a tender heart overwhelmed by feelings too heavy for her to carry alone.

What could have gone wrong? Children rarely act out without reason. Perhaps she was burdened with emotions she did not yet know how to express. Perhaps her small body was simply exhausted, hungry, or thirsty. Maybe she longed for reassurance from her parent or caregiver, or she was frustrated over something that seemed insignificant to an adult but enormous to her little world. It could even have been a result of insecurity from changes at home or in her routine that had unsettled her sense of safety.

Her behaviour was not about being bad. It was about needing to be understood. And in that moment, understanding was what she deserved the most.

This is where the role of the adult becomes vital. Instead of reacting with anger or frustration, the adult who approached her chose a path of calmness and compassion. Remaining composed, they ensured the safety of the child and those nearby. Then, gently kneeling to her level, they whispered softly, “I can see you are upset. I am here to help you.”

The effect was almost immediate. Though her sobs still came in waves, the storm inside her began to quiet down. Her feelings were acknowledged, her tears validated, and slowly she began to regain control. The message was clear: emotions are real and deserve recognition, but there are healthier and more peaceful ways to let them out.

Later reflection on the incident revealed an important truth. Such moments are not failures. They are powerful opportunities to nurture resilience, build emotional intelligence, and create trust. They remind us that every child is a world of feelings waiting to be guided with patience and wisdom.

The way forward for us as parents, educators, and caregivers is to be intentional in equipping our children with skills for life. We must teach them the language of emotions so they can name their feelings instead of acting them out. We need to provide safe outlets such as journaling, drawing, or even simple breathing exercises that allow them to release emotions constructively. We must collaborate closely with both parents and teachers so that children receive consistent support in every environment they grow in.

Equally important, we must create predictable routines that offer them stability and a sense of safety. Within these routines, we should integrate spiritual grounding through prayer, reflection, and uplifting stories that not only calm the mind but also nourish the soul with values of patience, gratitude, and kindness. And above all, we must embody patience and empathy in our daily lives. For children learn more from what they see us do than from what they hear us say.

Behind every meltdown lies a child who simply wants to be seen, heard, and guided. When we respond with wisdom instead of judgment, we do not merely calm a storm. We plant seeds of trust, character, and resilience that will grow into a stronger, more compassionate future generation.

At MYND YOUR CHILD, we are committed to equipping parents and children with the tools they need for character development, emotional intelligence, and spiritual grounding.

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Every tear a child sheds is a chance for us to water the seeds of resilience, love, and faith in their hearts.